Wednesday, August 02, 2006

Essay of the Starved

Essay of the Starved

I remember reading or hearing before that God despised a shaved pussy. I don’t know what Its feelings are on the Brazilian V, or is it referred to as the Brazilian Landing Strip? Regardless, this higher being probably prefers natural. A Bushman, if you will, with a free-flowing machete.
I don’t think that I heard or read that the same is true of Catholic priests. I also heard that there is no such phenomenon known as paranoia. Only the guilty are paranoid. There are only hallucinations, delirium, and faith to mess with humans. These are some of the trivial conflicts that arise when the human mind grows weak.
I feel a sharing of history with American alligators (Alligator mississippiensis daudin). A beast with the survival abilities of that of sharks, cockroaches, and flies. The greatest existing denizens of Earth. Although we share so much in common, no one has ever stuck their head in my mouth.
I suppose that I’d make a decent soup. Probably not as good as chicken, turtle or alligator, but more humane than shark fin.
The recipe would call for about two or three pounds, cut into small pieces, of my meat. One large onion (your choice) translucently chopped; three bunches of finely sliced green onions, three to five thinly sliced garlic toes, two and a quarter oz. of melted butter, a sliced up lemon, some bay leaves, nine oz. of sherry wine, one shot of Everclear, half gallon of beef stock, three to four oz. of brown roux, fourteen oz. tomato juice, salt,
and pepper and whatever your favorite flavors, herbs and sauces that you might want to add.
First, turn up the stereo and put on “Sister Morphine” by The Rolling Stones on a continuous loop. Then fry my meat up in the butter and set it off to the side. Sauté the chopped veggies in pan drippings, remove veggies and make brown roux next, then add the beef stock to the roux. Season to taste with the salt and pepper, sherry wine, Everclear, tomato juice, lemon, bay leaves, and some Worcestershire sauce (optional). Place the veggies and my meat into the gravy and simmer for one hour and fifty-five minutes or until my meat is tender. Makes approximately one and a half gallons.
However, most people can’t cook, change their oil, or count to ten in Spanish. Most people don’t vote, love, listen, scratch themselves in public, sleep naked, read, have a hobby or practice some form of artistic expression, get enough nutrition, listen to good music, watch good movies, abuse enough substances (or themselves for that matter), or even care about anything. This is our world and there’s absolutely nothing that can be done about it.


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